My student, “Betty,” was arrested after attending a Tone Lōc concert. She unknowingly wound up as a passenger in an allegedly stolen vehicle. The next morning, I received a phone call from Betty’s grandmother asking me to bail out her granddaughter.
After getting the cash from grandma, I went to the county jail where the guard took me to a dim and dank holding cell. I was looking all lawyerly with my blue pinstripe suit and sharp leather shoes and briefcase. Another guard escorted Betty into the cell. Her hair was disheveled, a stiletto was missing from one shoe, and she looked frazzled.
I said: “Betty, we have two options, I could get you out of here now, or” – as I reached into my briefcase – “right now, you can take the Midterm Exam that you missed last week.”
Betty’s reaction? “Get me the frick out of here!”
Ninety minutes after the exam commenced, Betty was set free. I’ll let you judge for yourself how true the prior sentence is.
Always remember: It’s good to be the prof.
Excerpt (pages 83-84) Classroom LIGHTBULBS
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